Work Shifts

Wait, I have to work?

We are “Party Throwers” as well as “Party Goers.” Being a member of Spanky’s (the best damn bar on theplaya) is more fun than a barrel of oil-covered-lesbian-midget-monkies-on-exstacy (just take my word for it, that’s fun). But that also means that we all have to do our share of the work on the playa to create a safe and fun environment.

Everyone must contribute in a meaningful way. There are lots of different things to do. There’s something for everybody. And we have people in camp that can teach you any of these jobs. Everyone should contribute at least 16 hours of their time at Burning Man to work shifts in Spanky’s Village.

Your 16 hour minimum does not include camp breakdown and cleanup at the end of the event. Everyone helps with those.

The Jobs (Click the job for description)

Job Title:  DOCENT

Prerequisites: Friendly personality and desire to help your fellow Spankers

Report to: Camp Bitch, or Dano, Webster, or Deryck

Objective: To greet Spankers as they arrive in camp early in Burn Week. 

Description: Meet, greet, and welcome Spankers as they arrive in camp. 

Shift Duration: 6 hours

Hours of Operation: Sunday 12:01am-6:01am, Monday, 6:00am-12:02pm, 12:01pm- 6:01pm, 6:00pm-12:01am, Tuesday 12:01am-6:01am, 6:00am-12:02pm, 12:01pm-6:01pm, 6:00pm-12:01am,

Equipment Needed: Camp Map, Camp Roster, Camp radio, flashlight, pen, patience, open mind and sense of humor

Duties:  Hang out in SWB HQ.  As Spankers arrive in camp, give them their arrival packets (camp map, work shifts, name tags, condoms, stickers, consent policy paperwork, etc). Have them read and sign Consent Policy. Inform them that in order to keep camp safe, they must wear their name tag lanyards AT ALL TIMES when in camp.  Walk them to their allocated camping spot, and confirming it on Camp Master Map in SWB HQ.  

Prerequisite:  A deep desire to inflict our SWB hijinks on our patrons & get them to have the best fucking time ever in the best goddamn bar on the Playa!  You will need to do a short training on the flaming enema, spanking & flogging.

Report to:  Bartenders first, then Camp Bitch.

Objective:  Walk around the bass encouraging folks to play the dice game, try a flaming enema, try some light dungeon activities & generally participate

Description: The majority of your duties will be inflicting the rolls of the deviant dice game but you should also be interacting with patrons and encouraging them to participate in whichever way feels right for them

Shift Duration:  4 hours + 1 minute (final shift of the night is only 3 hours:  12 am – 3 am)

Hours of Operation:  4:00 pm – 8:01pm, 8:00pm – 12:02am, 12:01am -3:00 am

Equipment Needed:  Your sexy ass!

Duties:  You are the face of the deviant dice game. Anything that is rolled that needs a SWB staff member to facilitate will be done by you ie:  spanking, flogging, flaming enemas etc.  Engage with our guests in a way that makes them want to keep hanging out & invite all of their friends back to the best fucking bar on the Playa!

Prerequisite: None

Report To: Camp Bitch, training also available from APJ.

Objective: To entice the citizens of BRC to partake in the toys and attractions of the village. To act as emcee and rile the crowd when appropriate. To make the village more fun!!! Entice passers-by on the streets to come into the bar

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 4:00 pm – 8:01pm, 8:00pm – 12:02am, 12:01 am -3:00 am


  • When the bar, attractions, toys, etc are not crowded or being used, it is your job to go out on the street with a megaphone and entice people to come into our space. You can adopt whatever tone suits you… Carnival barker, game show host, snarky reporter, circus ring leader, info-mercial salesman, etc.
  • When the bar area is crowded, but the toys and other camps spaces are not being used, your job is to mingle through the crowd and greet our guests (no megaphone needed)
  • Make sure they read the rules of consent (Consent 101)
  • Carry some “dirty name badges” with you (male and female). These are a great ice-breaker. These are pre-made name badges (ie. “Hello… My Name is:”) with humorous/dirty names on them. Sometimes they are clever double entendres, sometimes they are obvious, sometimes you need to say them out loud a few times before you get the dirty meaning of the name.
  • You go out on the street and stop people. You give them a new dirty name badge. You throw the trash in the trash bag.
  • This is a very social job. You will make lots of new friends. You will make lots of people laugh. You should also use this job to help promote village events, DJs, MPR, etc.
  • Have some kind of schtick too… like, say, “Pick a number between Neptune and cucumber”…then choose a name badge for them and say, “Your name for the rest of the day is ______”. Make sure they comprehend the name too.
  • Let them know about all the attractions in the village
  • Give them a tour of the camps in the village if they want one
  • Introduce them to Masters/Mistresses/Slaves that are on duty or available, if they’re interested
  • Tell them about the bar games
  • Introduce them to other Spankers and other patrons at the bar
  • Let them know that they are welcome to dance on the bar or stage
  • Get customers to interact with each other… be a matchmaker!
  • Promote the upcoming camp events (see the events page or events schedule at the bar for details). We usually have flyers at the bar which list our events for the week.
  • Recruit camp slaves! We all need slaves for massages, foot rubs, cooking, etc….and the bar area could always use more human benches! 😉
  • Let the customers know that they are in a safe space and it’s OK to get their freak on… within our limits.
  • Some people will be happy to just sit and chat at the bar with their friends, and that’s fine. Other people need a little social nudge to get them out of their shells… those are the people you are looking for
  • When the whole camp is totally rocking, get on the megaphone and cheerlead/commentate the wild things that are going on (bondage wall, Spank-O-Matic, etc)
  • Be fun, be humorous, promote the village and/or camp names often.
  • Keep an eye on the streets around SWB to make sure that bicycles and art cars aren’t blocking traffic… this could be a serious problem if emergency vehicles can’t get through. This happens almost every night.

Equipment Needed: Megaphone, Name Badges, trash bag, and a sexy outfit

Prerequisites: None

Report to: Bar Manager first (Disco Tits and/or Captain Obvious).  Camp Bitch second.  SEX Board last.

Objective: Sling shitty wine, shitty beer, entertain the patrons of Spanky’s Wine Bar

Shift Duration: 4hrs

Hours of Operation: 4:00pm – 8:01pm, 6:00pm – 10:01pm, 8:00pm – 12:02am, 10:00pm – 2:01am, 12:01am – 3:00am


  • SWB does not tolerate underage drinking (21 and over only!)  Always check IDs… carefully.  On occasion, law enforcement does “sting operations” to entrap bars at Bman.  They will usually use young girls in these stings.  The girls will be sent in and will try to get alcohol or drugs.  Don’t fall for it!  Be diligent!  You can be personally ticketed/fined for serving booze to a minor or having any hand in finding, selling, gifting, trading drugs… plus, they could shut down SWB.  Note:  Weed is still illegal at Bman… because it’s held on BLM (federal) land.
  • We are not allowed to serve anyone who is already drunk or clearly on substances.  This is a real law!
  • It is okay for 18+ customers to be in the camp and participate in other adult activities… but they can’t drink unless they are over 21… and they can’t be “at the bar”
  • People under 18 are not allowed in Spanky’s front yard.
  • If you are a seasoned SWB bartender… Disco Tits may ask you to be Bar Lead (head bartender for a shift or two).  She will inform you of your additional responsibilities if she taps you for this honor.
  • If a customer orders an “Angel Shot”, that is a code for something.  It means that somebody is harassing them, or they are feeling uncomfortable about someone… or they are in danger.  Be discrete and calm.  Ask if they can identify the person in question, without them noticing.  Immediately let the bar manager/lead know.  It is important to get that customer away from the harassing person/danger right away.  You can get more info/details once they are in a safe location (sanctuary, kitchen, SWB HQ, etc.)  Also, SWB Security needs to be informed of who the harasser/danger is, right away.  Also…if you see a customer in distress, you can offer them an Angel Shot
  • We don’t allow photography or video at SWB… unless there is consent from everyone who might appear in the photo/video.  No exceptions.
  • We have games at the bar (like Deviant Dare Dice).  Nobody should be forced to play, but please encourage them to play!  And nobody should be forced to perform the result of a roll of the dice if they don’t want to.  A fun approach, when somebody refuses to do what “the dice say” is to tell them they have to leave Spanky’s…. and come back in two minutes and can come back and try again (the last part will confuse them… and then they’ll smile)
  • There should always be hand sanitizer visible and accessible to all SWB patrons
  • There should also be at least one big water cooler at the bar… with clean ice in it!  Remind patrons to stay hydrated!
  • Offer water to any patrons who seem to have had too much alcohol.  It’s illegal to give more booze to somebody who is already drunk
  • When welcoming patrons, and checking their IDs, let them know about the Rules of Consent and Rules of the Bar… which should be posted prominently at the bar.  Let them know to report any violations to a bartender, security, or any member of the camp
  • Be familiar with the layout of the bar and the location of all the bar supplies
  • The vibe at the bar should be fun, but not overly rowdy. The scene should be sexy but not creepy/sleazy. If things get out of hand, nothing stops a ‘bad scene’ faster than killing the music. If you need help with unruly customers, let the bar manager know.  And there will be “SWB Security” available to help. Know who the Security personnel are during your shift.
  • Always have a lighter or two and there should be ashtrays on the bar. Please empty the ashtrays often, but be very careful not to dump hot embers into the trash
  • Know where the fire extinguisher is and know how to use it.
  • There will be a “bar back” (or two) during each shift.  Bartenders should read the job descriptions for their bar backs.
  • Keep the bar and trash organized. There will be two types of trash cans at the bar, one for general trash, one for recyclables. Use them properly… make sure others are too.  Empty and crush all cans before putting them in the recycle trash can.
  • Be mindful of your “pour”.  We have a limited supply of wine and other alcohol
  • There is a “Lost and Found” area in the bar.  Know where it is.  Place any left-behind items in there.
  • Learn the proper procedures for the coolers.  There is a system for making sure that cold drinks are served.
  • Ensure that there is always cold beer and white wine
  • NEVER use your hands to get ice that will be served in drinks.  Contaminating the ice is a health code violation… and gross!  Always use a scooper.  All drink-ice must come from Bman/Arctica.  There is ONE cooler with only ice in it… this is the one for drink ice.  Nothing else goes in that cooler.  It must be sanitized daily (or as needed)
  • We don’t ever serve fresh squeezed juice… health code violation.  (store-bought juices and mixers are OK.)
  • Don’t serve drinks in used cups (unless it is the customer’s personal cup)
  • There are cleaning supplies behind the bar.  Clean messes as they happen
  • The last shift of the night is responsible for cleaning up the bar, surrounding bar area, and hiding the alcohol.
  • Remind guest bartenders (read: Naked Bartender – dice game) to follow all the bar rules.  Supervise them!
  • And once again…CHECK IDs!!! 

Prerequisites: none

Report to: Bartenders first. Bar Manager second (Disco Tits or Captain Obvious) second. Camp Bitch third.  

Objective:  Keep the logistics of the bar flowing smoothly. Make sure the bartenders have everything they need at their fingertips.

Shift Duration: 4:00 hrs

Hour of operation:

4:00 pm – 8:01pm, 8:00pm – 12:02am, 12:01am -3:00 am

Equipment Needed:  Your sexy ass!

Duties:  You are the face of the deviant dice game. Anything that is rolled that needs a SWB staff member to facilitate will be done by you ie:  spanking, flogging, flaming enemas etc.  Engage with our guests in a way that makes them want to keep hanging out & invite all of their friends back to the best fucking bar on the Playa!


  • Bar backs need to know the whole job description for Bartenders.  Please read all of that.
  • The bartenders are SWB’s “front line” personnel.  Your job is to make theirs easier by not letting them get bogged down in resupplying/stocking, cleaning, logistics, etc
  • You may also be asked to help-out bartending from time to time
  • Make sure the bartenders have full wine bottles ready (with our wine labels already on them). Use funnels to add more wine to existing (labelled) bottles
  • Put new labels on wine bottles as needed (we have SWB labels that are humorous)… only put new labels on the bottles when the old ones become damaged or unreadable. Don’t put bottles with our labels in the coolers as the ice/water will ruin them. Chill white wines in the coolers with the existing (real) labels, then funnel the wine into the serving bottles (with our labels) as needed.
  • Make sure your hands are clean when working in the coolers!
  • Coolers need to be periodically drained of water, and fresh ice added
  • Keep the trash/recycling organized. As cans fill up, pull out the bag and tie it off with a twist-tie. Then put a new bag in the can. All aluminum cans should be crushed and stored separately so we can bring them to recycle camp the following day.
  • Once any general (non-recycling) trash bag is full and tied up, it should be distributed evenly amongst village members for disposal after the event.
  • Keep the bar top free of trash/junk, clean and organized. There are cleaning supplies located under the bar. Use disinfectant spray as needed.
  • Keep the supplies under the bar neat and organized. If we are running out of bar supplies (cups, cleaning products, etc) alert the Bar Manager.
  • Keep the ground surrounding the bar free of trash.
  • Do not leave a messy, sticky bar for the next shift to clean.
  • Act as a “go-fer” if the bartenders need anything else.
  • Report any violations of the bar or consent to the bartenders or SWB security

Prerequisite:  You must have minimum one year SWB experience to do this job.

Report to: Dano, Webster, or Deryck

Objective:  To act as the “Village Supervisor”, oversee the village staff, toys and infrastructure. Ensure that Spankers show up for their work shifts. Act as roving problem solver.

Description:  Despite the title, Camp Bitch should usually be a fun and pleasant job with an attitude that reflects the same. Please have a clear head for your entire shift.

Shift Duration: 8 hours

Hours of Operation: 12:00pm-8:01pm or 8:00pm-4:00am

Equipment Needed: Village Map, SWB Vest/Hat, Paper/Pen, WORKSHIFT ROSTER, Flashlight, SWB radio, NARCAN. Know location of First Aid kit, senior SWB staff, medical staff, fire extinguishers

Duties – Staffing:

  • Get shift roster from SWB HQ.  This will have all the names and hours of Spankers “on duty” during your shift.  
  • We like things staffed, so if somebody doesn’t show up for their shift, send the Bottom Bitch to roust them from their tent/RV to report.  If they are AWOL, try to find another Spanker to cover their shift.  BE SURE TO NOTE “PRESENT” or “AWOL” ON THE SHIFT ROSTER!
  • Terminate the shift of any Spanker that is being unsafe or is doing their job so badly that you feel it must be stopped
  • Check to see if workers need anything (sunscreen, food, water, etc)
  • Put completed SHIFT ROSTER in binder at SWB HQ at the end of the shift

Duties – General:

  • CAMP BITCH is in charge of Spanky’s Wine Bar during your shift.   The buck stops with you (mostly).
  • Periodically check on structures, toys and other equipment for safety and security
  • Periodically check on generator fuel levels and contact  SPOOGE (Olaf ) or SEX (Dano) if the gennie needs filling (1/4 tank or less)
  • Welcome any new Spankers (village members) as they arrive at Bman. Let them know that the first thing they should do is be officially “Greeted” by one of the SPANKY’S DOCENTS who will be on duty until Tuesday at midnight.  After that, it is the duty of the CAMP BITCH to greet, place, and welcome late arriving Spankers.
  • Check in with other SWB managers (learn who they are) to see if they need anything (Bar, MOD Squad, Dancers, Kitchen/Sanctuary, etc.)
  • Know how to handle and report emergencies. Cooperate with BRC Rangers and/or Law Enforcement if a situation arises
  • Wear hat (or not) and vest during shift. Return equipment to SWB HQ at the end of your shift (or give equipment to the next Camp Bitch).
  • Put radio in charger.
  • Inform Webster (head of security), Disco Tits (bar management), or Dano of any emergencies

Prerequisite: None

Report to: Camp Bitch (Top Bitch)

Objective: Learn how the camp runs.  Consider it Camp Bitch Trainee

Description: Despite the title, Aide de Camp Bitch is probably even more fun and pleasant than the one it shadows. Please have a clear head for your entire shift.

Shift Duration: 8 hours

Hours of Operation: 12:00pm-8:01pm, 8:00pm-4:00am

Equipment Needed: Your ass, Paper/Pen, Flashlight, and a desire to learn.

Duties: Act as a “go fer” for the Camp Bitch. Help CB ensure that all of our attractions are properly staffed.  Solve problems. Interact with our visitors.  Check fuel levels in the gennies. Help security patrol camp. 

Prerequisites: A good sense of humor and a strong level of attentiveness

Report to: Camp Bitch, Bar Manager

Objective: To ensure the safe and fun consumption of Spanky’s ‘Front of House Attractictions’

Description: Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to monitor and operate our front of house attractions. This means that you will operate the spank-o-matic, keep an eye on the buffer zone, provide  general assistance to our trigger operators should they require a wee break, and as you are likely to be an initial point of contact with people entering the bar, to give our patrons whatever directions are necessary for their enjoyment of our facilities. In the same vein, it’s imperative that if you see anything that needs to be brought to the attention of our security staff that you do so. You’re a key part of our eyes and ears. 

Shift Duration: 2 Hours, last shift 3 Hours

Hours of Operation: 4pm-6:01pm, 6:00pm-8:01pm, 8:00pm-10:01pm, 10:00pm-12:01am, 12:00am-3:00am

Equipment Needed: A personal flashlight, adequate training, a thorough knowledge of the goings on at camp

Duties: Your main duty is the operation of the SPANK-O-MATIC. Make sure you have received training, and get some asses all nice and rosy! This will take up the lion’s share of your time, as it is rather popular.

Your second duty is to monitor the goings on at the buffer zone. You’re really there for two reasons, to make sure everything going on is consensual and groovy, and to make sure no one is getting their hair caught in the buffers by not covering their body adequately before getting their buzz on. If such a thing does happen (god forbid), understand the safe operation of a screwdriver such that the issue can be addressed. Keep an eye out for creepy or unsafe behavior, but in a relatively passive way. If patrons need additional instruction on the buffer zone, provide it, but you’re there to spank not buff. 

If you are on the late shift, your duties will officially terminate at 3AM, but you are expected to assist the bar staff and security with closing up the house for the night–basic cleaning, making sure the lights are off, etc.

Prerequisites: Completion of the B.E.D. course & Approval by the CET.

Report to: C.E.T. Leadership. Hornycorn first. If not available, Tad or For Later (kitchen lead)

Objective: To roleplay consent in a fun way in exchange for treats during Spanky’s events.

Description: This is an entertainer role.

Dress with a large Hi: My name is Consent Candy badge and candy costume with treats attached that can be disbursed. Also hand out consent candy/treats in Halloween/Easter style to those who roleplay consent either direct to Consent Candy or to someone else. Make it a game; remember to be fun and playful. Approach those around partying and socializing. Get other campmates/the Spanker on shift with you to do big roleplays that are entertaining, educational, confident and obvious.

Shift Duration: 4 hours.

Hours of Operation: 10:00pm-2:00am Wednesday Friday and Saturday.

Equipment Needed: Candy costume, basket and treats (candy, condoms, etc.)

Duties: Dance around under the BASS (and anywhere else with activity) performing role listed in “Description.” Switch costume every so often with shift partner for who is lead. 

Prerequisites: Completion of the B.E.D. course & approval by the CET.

Report to: C.E.T. Leadership. Hornycorn first. If not available, Tad or For Later (kitchen lead)

Objective: To welcome into camp with good vibes while also reminding to follow the 11th Principle and inform about camp rules.

Description: Following B.E.D.’s lead on this one!

“The beloved Consent Ambassador is anyone who is simply aware the Consent Enforcement Process and knows who is Approved to Remove in camp if a fellow burner needs help. They are an advocate for the basic respect of our 11 principles.”

Shift Duration: 4 Hours

Hours of Operation: 8:00pm – 12am

Equipment Needed: A sign introducing the Consent Ambassador on shift along with listing the 11th principle & house rules.

Duties: Following B.E.D.’s lead on this one!

  • Make it FUN!

  • Welcome guests and foreshadow house rules at the camp frontage or activation areas

  • Guests can go to them for assistance

  • They know how to get additional help

Prerequisite: Knowledge of basic first aid. Ability to remain calm to manage and resolve conflicts. Ability to recognize when a situation needs further medical attention (Rampart, LEO’s, Rangers)

Reports to: Camp Bitch and then Solar.

Objective: Provide comfort and care to those in crisis or in need of medical attention.

Description: This is a safe and confidential space for Spankers
or patrons that need to retreat and recover, or to receive basic first aid. Snacks, hydration, shade and comfort are available. Knowledge of basic first aid is a must, and psychiatric experience would be a bonus. Always know that in a true emergency there will be extra people in camp to help. There is an emergency medical radio that will be in headquarters that will connect directly to Burning Man Medical.

Shift duration: 6 hours

Hours of operation: 4:00pm-10:01pm, and 10:00pm-3:00am.

Equipment needed: Provided SWB radio and medical kit, knowledge of art cars/transportation within SWB and locations, general knowledge where lead Spankers are located.

Duties: To be “on-call” for your shift. This means carrying your radio with you at all times, checking on the sanctuary tent from time to time, and assuring that all equipment is available and ready for issues that may arise. A more detailed manual will be in the Sanctuary space which outlines specifics on how to initiate first aid and CPR, as well as suggestions for dealing with a crisis. All people that sign up will be given a rundown of operations directly from Solar.

Prerequisite: None


Objective:  To protect the village, its members and customers. To guard private spaces.

Shift Duration: 8 hours

Hours of Operation: 12:00pm-8:01pm or 8:00pm-4:00am

Equipment Needed: Flashlight, security vest, SWB radio, a talent for diplomacy

Duties: We do a variety of things, but the most important is just ‘keeping an eye out’ and exercising good judgment about whether something requires our intervention, and intervening if necessary. 

Unlike many jobs at spanky’s an amount of sobriety is required while you’re on shift. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but you have to be able to respond in the context of an emergency. 

Security’s main job is to ensure that Spankys is a safe, consensual, and healthy environment. Security makes sure that there are no under-age persons drinking alcohol or viewing “adult oriented” scenes in the village. Also, to ensure that the dancers and mistresses are not being harassed by anyone, and guard private spaces when there are private scenes happening that are not open to the general public.

Security’s job is not one of violence or harsh confrontation, but rather, one of DIPLOMACY and REASON. If any situation escalates to a threat of violence, Security should immediately attempt to contact a BRC Ranger or law enforcement. The only exception to this rule would be an imminent threat to somebody else’s safety, at which time Security will immediately announce over the radio “Code Black!,” and your location, and attempt to gain assistance of any Spanky’s management person around. At that point, any Spanky’s management on their radio will come to Security’s aid in an attempt to stop any ensuing violence from occurring.

Photography is not allowed in the public facing areas of camp. Security should be on the lookout for and must ask patrons to delete photos if taken without permission of everyone in the photo. 

If we need to find Rangers, have Spankers fan out into the street to find nearby rangers, while at least one person goes to the nearest Ranger Station. Stations are at Center Camp, 3:00 Plaza, and 9:00 Plaza.

Security should know where to find:

  • Water – at the bar, headquarters, and kitchen

  • Minor first aid and sanctuary – next to the kitchen – Solar is the head this year

  • Spanky’s Lost & Found – at the bar

  • Major Medical problems – Rampart Nearest Ranger Station – Stations are at Center Camp, 3:00 Plaza, and 9:00 Plaza

  • Fire Extinguishers – bar and in Eve’s kitchen

Additional Security Procedures

  • Encourage anyone who had too much to drink to get some water

  • Be alert for people openly doing drugs or, and if found, politely ask them to stop.  PLEASE DON’T ASK TO SHARE.

  • Should know who the art car drivers are in case we need to use one for an emergency such as transporting someone with an injury

  • Can ask DJ’s to make important security announcements – such as “Happy Monday” if law enforcement is in camp or asking patrons to move their bikes

  • Can recruit any Spankers or bartenders to help watch someone if they appear suspicious or are getting too drunk

  • Keep an eye on all the camp bondage gear so that patrons don’t walk away with it

  • About once each hour, wander around camp for dangerous situations to make sure there is no exposed rebar, wires people can trip on, passed out burners, and shine flashlights in dark areas – that’s where bad things can happen

  • About once an hour ensure that the streets surrounding Spanky’s are free of bikes and art cars so emergency vehicles can pass through.

  • Have the DJ make announcements for patrons – bikes or art cars need to be removed from the road (this happens almost every night).

  • Can recruit other Spankers to help move bikes if needed

  • Set up a perimeter for fire performances

Duties – General:

  • Periodically check on structures, toys and other equipment for safety and security

  • Periodically check on generator fuel levels and contact Olaf or Dano if the gennie needs filling (1/4 tank or less)

  • Welcome any new Spankers (village members) as they arrive at Bman after Tuesday. Let them know that the first thing they should do is be officially “Greeted” by one of our DOCENTS, or Amethyst, or Dano.
    From Sunday through Tuesday morning, DOCENTS will greet Spankers as they arrive.

  • Check in with other SWB managers (learn who they are) to see if they need anything (Bar, MOD Squad, Dancers, Kitchen/Sanctuary, etc.)

  • Know how to handle and report emergencies. Cooperate with BRC Rangers and/or Law Enforcement if a situation arises

  • Wear vest while on shift. Return equipment to SWB HQ at the end of your shift if it’s the end of the night. Otherwise, pass equipment on to the next security person.

  • Inform Webster (head of security), Disco Tits, OR Captain Obvious (bar management), or Dano of any emergencies

Prerequisites: You feel like dancing in the bar to help keep the party going 

Report to:  Camp Bitch 

Objective:  Keep people engaged & having a great time at the best fucking bar on the Playa! 

Description:  Dancing on stage in the bar Shift

Shift Duration: 2 hours

Hours of Operation: 6:00pm-8:01pm, 8:00pm-10:01pm, 10:00pm-12:01am

Equipment Needed:  Your sexy ass!

Duties: Show up for your shift. Dance. Engage with our guests in a way that makes them want to keep hanging out & invite all of their friends back to the best fucking bar on the Playa! Don’t forget to drink water!

Prerequisite: Be able to operate a motor vehicle.

Reports to: Kitchen Manager first, Camp Bitch second. Training by Jenn.

Objective: To take ice orders, collect money and retrieve ice for village members and the bar. Also, deliver used/crushed aluminum cans to recycle camp.

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 10am-2pm

Equipment Needed:  Paper (clipboard), SWB radio, pen, money pouch (located at SWB HQ)


  • Prior to beginning, find a person in camp with an art car (or SWB handicap vehicle) and ask if they could drive you to and from “Camp Arctica” for the ice run.
  • At 10am go to SWB HQ and get the supplies needed. The clipboard should note the cost of ice (per bag of cubes or block). Then find Amethyst, who will give you money for the “bar, kitchen, and HQ” ice order. Then use the megaphone and walk around the village announcing that you are taking ice orders for the village, and Spankers should come to the bar to meet you and place (and pay for) their ice order.
  • As you take orders, collect the money needed for each person’s order (give change immediately if you can) and WRITE EVERYTHING down! Note their name, how many bags of cubes/blocks each person ordered, how much they paid and how much change they are to receive (if change wasn’t made on the spot). Be very careful not to lose the money or the paperwork!!!!)
  • Once sufficient time has been given for everyone to place their orders, find the Bar Manager to see if there are any bags of cans to be delivered to “Recycle Camp” (located in or near center camp).
  • Take the art car, deliver the cans, and then get in line to buy ice.  Large Theme Camps get to use the back entrance to Arctica
  • After ice is purchased, load it onto the art car and go immediately back to camp
  • Immediately make an announcement that the ice orders have arrived and that people should come to the bar area to pick up their ice
  • Bar ice should be given to the “Bar Backs” so they can load it into the coolers.
  • As people come to collect their ice orders, take note on the paperwork and give change as needed
  • Walk through camp and announce the ice order arrival to any stragglers (or those who are apparently hard-of-hearing)
  • Return the supplies to SWB HQ when done

Prerequisite: None

Report to: Camp Bitch, training also available by Dylan.

Objective: To ensure the village is free of M.O.O.P. (matter out of place – aka trash), and to help educate Spankers regarding proper LNT procedures

Shift Duration: 2 hours

Hours of Operation: 12pm-2pm

Equipment needed:  Cleaning supplies, trash bags, mechanical trash grabber sticks, gloves (all at the bar)


  • Wear rubber gloves during this job.
  • Clean and organize the bar and bar trash/recycling cans at the bar.
  • Walk through the village and pick up any and all trash… This includes areas around all camp toys, structures, shower area, surrounding streets, etc, as well as Spanker camping areas at-large.
  • If you find a village member’s camp/area to be particularly messy (with litter or other things strewn about that could blow away in the wind), feel free to politely chastise them.
  • Walk the streets on all sides of the village and pick up trash (theme camps are required to clean the streets around the camp)
  • Full bags of aluminum cans are delivered to Recycle Camp during the ice run each day.  Bags full of other recyclables and general trash get immediately distributed evenly amongst village members for disposal after the event.
  • Return cleaning products to their proper place under the bar when done…. then go take a shower, stinky.

Prerequisites:  Get your ass “Spank U Certified” in spanking, flogging, paddling, basic bondage & consent. Contact Headmaster SP (Snow Patrol) to get certified. I will make it easy & fun!

Report to:  Camp Bitch

Objective:  Look out for the safety of our campmates & guests in the light dungeon. Be able to step in and coach/instruct/demonstrate basic, light BDSM techniques to help everyone stay safe and have a great time.

Description:  You are the coach/hall monitor of the light dungeon and any other BDSM play that takes place in the bar area.

Shift Duration:  4 hours + 1 minute (final shift of the night is only 3 hours: 12 am – 3 am)

Hours of Operation:  4:00pm-8:01pm, 8:00pm-12:02am, 12:01am-3:00am

Equipment needed:  None

Duties: Be alert and diligent about looking out for everyone. If something looks hinky have a conversation w/the person. Talk to them the way you would talk to them if you were a teacher and they were your student. Be kind and offer instruction rather than being accusatory.

If anyone is too intoxicated, belligerent, not listening, not following rules or doing anything else that gives you concern alert the security team lead immediately. It is not your responsibility to handle these types of situations.

Prerequisite: None
Reports to: Kitchen Manager, training available from For Now, For Later
Objective: Monitor the kitchen area. Make sure everything is clean, put away, taken care of, turned off, or turned on as fits. Make sure everyone is behaving.
Description: Make coffee in the morning between the hours of 8am and 10am as needed. Make sure Spankers that use the kitchen clean up after themselves and turn off appliances. Empty the trash can if needed and replace the liner. Wipe down tables, chairs, grill, and stovetop with provided cleaning rag. (Do not use dish sponges on table surfaces) Direct additional questions to For Now or For Later as needed. Report any issues that need to be addressed to For Now or For Later.
Rotate between the kitchen and the chill space. In the morning, lunchtime, and dinnertime spend more time monitoring the kitchen. In the afternoon and evening hang out more at the chill space. Make sure everyone is behaving. 
Shift Duration: 2 hour increments
Hours of Operation: 8:00am – 10:01am, 10:am – 12:02pm, 12:01pm – 2:01pm, 2:00pm – 4:01pm, 4:00pm – 6:01pm, 6:00pm – 8:00pm
Equipment Needed: Provided

Prerequisite: Attend a 15 minutes training onsite (at camp) immediately after our 1st camp meeting adjourns.

Report to: Camp Bitch, training by Jeff, Trigger’s creator.

Objective: Encourage riders to explore Trigger’s unique and powerful vibrations to each rider’s enjoyment level.

Description: Trigger is a motorized saddle with surprise features.

Shift duration: 2 HOURS

Hours of operation: 4pm-6:01pm, 6:00pm-8:01pm, 8:00pm-10:01pm, 10:00pm-12:02am, 12:01am – 2:00am

Equipment needed: Blue Tooth tablet (supplied), instructions, and ride operator lanyard. Optional: Sexy Cowboy/Cowgirl outfit. ASSLESS CHAPS ENCOURAGED.

Duties: Once the rider mounts Trigger the Wonder Saddle, explain to the rider the correct riding position to get the most enjoyment during their adventure. You will be trained to help the “rider” find the right position. POSITION IS VERY IMPORTANT.

Explain the controls and then turn over speed controls to the rider. Once the rider has tried out the variable speeds of the saddle, then you the operator can switch control over to a blue tooth tablet. The APP has pre-programmed patterns to choose from. The tablet can be controlled by the operator, the rider, or someone designated by the rider. (Ex: boyfriend, girlfriend, stranger, person in the crowd, or anyone the rider chooses)

Note: Some riders will enjoy the crowds’ participation and some will be quieter. Follow your rider’s direction. Some riders like to ‘put on a show’ and others tune out the crowd. When the ride is over, make sure the rider presses the RED STOP BUTTON and this activates the school bell and flashing beacon. Encourage the crowd to clap and cheer for the rider.

Consent: Per Spanky’s Wine Bar Rules, photos and video are NOT allowed. Exception – only when the rider gives consent/permission. Make sure other people in the photo zone give their consent also. ONLY THE RIDER CAN GIVE CONSENT to being photographed or videoed. (EX: I am his/her friend, partner, campmate…) That is not consent. Only the rider can give consent.


Prerequisites: training and selection by SEX Board

Report to: RV Servixes 1st, Camp Bitch 2nd

Objective: refill RV fresh water tanks

Description: with the help of Water Boy II, transfer fresh water from IBC cubes into Spanky’s RV campers

Shift Duration: 4hrs

Hours of Operation: Monday 12:01pm-4:00pm, Wednesday 12:01pm-4:00pm, Friday 12:01pm-4:00pm

Equipment Needed: Work Gloves, sombrero, clipboard, list of RVs to be refilled, pen

Duties: Transfer water from full tanks near kitchen into empty tanks on truck, then deliver water to RVs on the list on each of the shift days. Measure water dispensed and mark on order sheet. Expect to manhandle hoses, pumps, IBC cubes, clipboard.

Report to: Water Boy I first, RV Servixes 2nd, Camp Bitch 3rd

Objective: refill RV fresh water tanks

Description: assist Water Boy I in transferring fresh water from IBC Cubes into Spanky’s RV campers

Shift Duration: 4 hrs

Hours of Operation: Monday 12:01pm-4:00pm, Wednesday 12:01pm-4:00pm, Friday 12:01pm-4:00pm

Equipment Needed: Work Gloves, sombrero, 

Duties:  Assist Water Boy i transferring water from full tanks near kitchen into empty tanks on truck, then deliver water to RVs on the list on each of the shift days.  Expect to manhandle hoses, pumps, IBC cubes, and maybe even a clipboard.

Prerequisites: Good hand-eye coordination, a strong sense of self-preservation

Report to: SPOOGE

Objective: Keep the camp’s turbo encabulator running and in tip-top shape

Description: Like all camps, Spanky’s turbo encabulator is the beating (rotating?) heart of the camp.  Do your part to keep the party going, and try your best to keep all your fingers in the process.

Shift Duration: 2hrs

Hours of Operation: 6:00-8:01pm, 8:00pm-10:01pm, 10:00pm-12:02am, 12:01-2:01am

Equipment Needed: A wide variety of sockets and wrenches in both SAE and metric, various Robertson screwdrivers, a smattering of industrial lubes and greases, an oscilloscope

Duties:  Measure the conductors and fluxes to make sure they’re within spec, clean the tremie pipes, lube the lunar waneshaft to keep the side fumbling to a minimum, gap the girdle spring, wipe the playa dust off the panametric fan.  NOTE:  Spanky’s doesn’t require skor motion, so a dingle arm isn’t used, but sinusoidal repleneration should still be checked and logged.

Prerequisites: none

Report to: Camp Bitch

Objective: Keep two Portos clean

Description: The BORG has asked each theme camp to be responsible for two Portos at the nearest Blue Light Special

Shift Duration: 4 hrs.

Hours of Operation:  8pm-12:01am

Equipment Needed: toothbrush, rubber gloves, knee pads, maybe a mask, 

Duties: Once per hour, wipe down toilet seats, scrub out nooks and crannies to rid the porto of crusty bits with toothbrush, spider webs, misplaced toilet paper.  Don’t forget the urinals!