Work Shifts

Wait, I have to work?

We are “Party Throwers” as well as “Party Goers.” Being a member of Spanky’s (the best damn bar on theplaya) is more fun than a barrel of oil-covered-lesbian-midget-monkies-on-exstacy (just take my word for it, that’s fun). But that also means that we all have to do our share of the work on the playa to create a safe and fun environment.

Everyone must contribute in a meaningful way. There are lots of different things to do. There’s something for everybody. And we have people in camp that can teach you any of these jobs. Everyone should contribute at least 12 hours of their time at Burning Man to work shifts in Spanky’s Village.

Your 12 hour minimum does not include camp breakdown and cleanup at the end of the event. Everyone helps with those.

The Jobs

Prerequiste: You must have minimum 2 yrs SWB experience to do this job

Objective: To act as the “Village Supervisor”, oversee the village staff, toys and infrastructure. Ensure that Spankers show up for their work shifts. Act as roving problem solver.

Description: Despite the title, Camp Bitch should usually be a fun and pleasant job with an attitude that reflects the same. Please have a clear head for your entire shift.

Shift Duration: 8 hours (counts as 4 hours of workshifts each if doing it with partner)

Hours of Operation: 10am-6pm or 6pm-2am

Equipment Needed: Village Map, Megaphone, SWB Vest/Hat, Paper/Pen, Workshift Schedule, Flashlight, SWB radio. Know location of FA kit, senior SWB staff, medical staff, security staff, fire
extinguishers, “Floaters”

Duties:

  • Acquire needed equipment at the beginning of your shift from Admiral Painjoy at SWB HQ or from the previous Camp Bitch
  • Ensure that the Workshift Supervisor is making sure that Spankers show up for their workshifts
  • Plug-in “Floaters” to fill-in for those who didn’t show up for their shifts
  • Terminate the shift of any Spanker that is being unsafe or is doing their job so badly that you feel it must be stopped
  • Check to see if workers need anything (sunscreen, food, water, etc)
  • Periodically check on structures, toys and other equipment for safety and security
  • Periodically check on generator fuel levels and contact “Admiral Painjoy” or “Major-D” if the gennie needs filling (1/4 tank or less)
  • Welcome any new Spankers (village members) as they arrive at Bman. Let them know that the first thing they should do is be officially “Greeted” by Admiral Painjoy or Amethyst
  • Check in with other SWB managers (learn who they are) to see if they need anything (Bar, Security, MOD Squad, Dancers, Kitchen/Sanctuary, etc.)
  • Know how to handle and report emergencies. Cooperate with BRC Rangers and/or Law Enforcement if a situation arises
  • Wear hat and vest during shift. Return equipment to SWB HQ at the end of your shift (or give equipment to the next Camp Bitch)
  • Inform Niloc (head of security), Tripp or Disco Tits (bar management), Admiral Painjoy of any emergencies

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 10am-2am

Equipment Needed: Everything you need should be located at the bar.  You should also wear your namebadge!  And bring a headlamp

Description:  Serve patron drinks while keeping the bar fun and sexy.  Follow the rules.  Encourage Participation.  Be professional, yet fun.

THE RULES OF THE BAR

  • Tripp is our bar manager.  Disco Tits is our assistant bar manager.
  • SWB does not tolerate underage drinking (21 and over only!)  Always check IDs… carefully.  On occasion, law enforcement does “sting operations” to entrap bars at Bman.  They will usually use young girls in these stings.  The girls will be sent in and will try to get alcohol or drugs.  Don’t fall for it!  Be diligent!  You can be personally ticketed/fined for serving booze to a minor or having any hand in finding, selling, gifting, trading drugs… plus, they could shut down SWB.  Note:  Weed is still illegal at Bman… because it’s held on BLM (federal) land.
  • We are not allowed to serve anyone who is already drunk or clearly on substances.  This is a real law!
  • It is okay for 18+ customers to be in the camp and participate in other adult activities… but they can’t drink unless they are over 21… and they can’t be “at the bar”.
  • If you are a seasoned SWB bartender… Tripp may ask you to be Bar Lead (head bartender for a shift or two).  He will inform you of your additional responsibilities if he taps you for this honor.
  • If a customer orders an “Angel Shot”, that is a code for something.  It means that somebody is harassing them, or they are feeling uncomfortable about someone… or they are in danger.  Be discrete and calm.  Ask if they can identify the person in question, without them noticing.  Immediately let the bar manager/lead know.  It is important to get that customer away from the harassing person/danger right away.  You can get more info/details once they are in a safe location (sanctuary, kitchen, SWB HQ, etc.)  Also, SWB Security needs to be informed of who the harasser/danger is, right away.  Also…if you see a customer in distress, you can offer them an Angel Shot
  • We don’t allow photography or video at SWB… unless there is consent from everyone who might appear in the photo/video.  No exceptions.
  • We have games at the bar (like Deviant Dare Dice).  Nobody should be forced to play, but please encourage them to play!  And nobody should be forced to perform the result of a roll of the dice if they don’t want to.  A fun approach, when somebody refuses to do what “the dice say” is to tell them they have to leave Spanky’s…. and come back in two minutes and can come back and try again (the last part will confuse them… and then they’ll smile)
  •  If you’re an experienced bartender already (2 yrs min.), Tripp may give you the honor of being Lead Bartender for your shifts.  
  • There should always be COVID-19 supplies at the bar (masks and hand sanitizer pump bottles) visible and accessable to all SWB patrons
  • There should also be at least one big water cooler at the bar… with clean ice in it!  Remind patrons to stay hydrated!
  • Offer water to any patrons who seem to have had too much alcohol.  It’s illegal to give more booze to somebody who is already drunk
  • When welcoming patrons, and checking their IDs, let them know about the Rules of Consent and Rules of the Bar… which should be posted prominently at the bar.  Let them know to report any violations to a bartender, security, or any member of the camp
  • Be familiar with the layout of the bar and the location of all the bar supplies
  • The vibe at the bar should be fun, but not overly rowdy. The scene should be sexy but not creepy/sleezy. If things get out of hand, nothing stops a ‘bad scene’ faster than killing the music. If you need help with unruly customers, let the bar manager know.  And there will be “SWB Security” available to help. Know who the Security personnel are during your shift.  Niloc is the head of Security.
  • Always have a lighter or two and there should be ashtrays on the bar. Please empty the ashtrays often, but be very careful not to dump hot embers into the trash
  • Know where the fire extinguisher is and know how to use it.
  • There will be a “bar back” (or two) during each shift.  Bartenders should read the job descriptions for their bar backs.
  • Keep the bar and trash organized. There will be two types of trash cans at the bar, one for general trash, one for recyclables. Use them properly… make sure others are too.  Empty and crush all cans before putting them in the recycle trash can.
  • Be mindful of your “pour”.  We have a limited supply of wine and other alcohol
  • There is a “Lost and Found” area in the bar.  Know where it is.  Place any left-behind items in there.
  • Learn the proper procedures for the coolers.  There is a system for making sure that cold drinks are served.
  • Ensure that there is always cold beer and white wine
  • NEVER use your hands to get ice that will be served in drinks.  Contamination the ice is a health code violation… and gross!  Always use a scooper.  And all drink-ice must come from Bman/Arctica.  There is ONE cooler with only ice in it… this is the one for drink ice.  Nothing else goes in that cooler.  It must be sanitized daily (or as needed)
  • We don’t ever serve fresh squeezed juice… health code violation.
  • Don’t serve drinks in used cups (unless it is the customer’s personal cup)
  • There are cleaning supplies behind the bar.  Clean messes as they happen
  • The last shift of the night is responsible for cleaing up the bar, surrounding bar area, and hiding the alcohol.
  • Remind guest bartenders (read: Naked Bartender – dice game) to follow all the bar rules.  Supervise them!
  • And once again…CHECK IDs!!! 

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 10am-2am

Equipment needed: Everything you need should be at the bar. Know the location of the beer/wine, for when restocking is needed.

Description: The bar back keeps the logistics of the bar flowing smoothly. Make sure the bartenders have everything they need at their fingertips.

Duties:

  • Barbacks need to know the whole job description for Bartenders.  Please read all of that.
  • The bartenders are SWB’s “front line” personnel.  Your job is to make theirs easier by not letting them get bogged down in resupplying/stocking, cleaning, logistics, etc
  • You may also be asked to help-out bartending from time to time
  • Make sure the bartenders have full wine bottles ready (with our wine labels already on them). Use funnels to add more wine to existing (labelled bottles)
  • Put new labels on wine bottles as needed (we have SWB lables that are humorous)… only put new labels on the bottles when the old ones become damaged or unreadable. Don’t put bottles with our labels in the coolers as the ice/water will ruin them. Chill white wines in the coolers with the existing (real) labels, then funnel the wine into the serving bottles (with our labels) as needed.
  • Make sure your hands are clean when working in the coolers!
  • Keep the trash/recycling organized. As cans fill up, pull out the bag and tie it off with a twist-tie. Then put a new bag in the can. All aluminum cans should be crushed and stored separately so we can bring them to recycle camp the following day. All other recycling and general trash bags should be distributed evenly amongst village members for disposal after the event.
  • Keep the bar top free of trash/junk, clean and organized. There are cleaning supplies located under the bar. Use disinfectant spray as needed.
  • Keep the supplies under the bar neat and organized. If we are running out of bar supplies (cups, cleaning products, etc) alert the Bar Manager.
  • Keep the ground surrounding the bar free of trash.
  • Do not leave a messy, sticky bar for the next shift to clean.
  • Act as a “go-fer” if the bartenders need anything else.
  • Report any violations of the bar or consent to the bartenders or SWB security

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 10am-2pm

Equipment Needed: Paper (clipboard), SWB radio, pen, money pouch (located at SWB HQ)

Objective: To take ice orders, collect money and retrieve ice for village members and the bar. Also, deliver used/crushed aluminum cans to recycle camp

Duties:

  • Prior to beginning, find a person in camp with an art-car (or SWB handicap vehicle) and ask if they could drive you to and from “Camp Arctica” for the ice run.
  • At 10am go to SWB HQ and get the supplies needed. The clipboard should note the cost of ice (per bag of cubes or block). Then find Admiral Painjoy who will give you money for the “bar and kitchen” ice order. Then use the megaphone and walk around the village announcing that you are taking ice orders for the village, and Spankers should come to the bar to meet you and place (and pay for) their ice order.
  • As you take orders, collect the money needed for each person’s order (give change immediately if you can) and WRITE EVERYTHING down! Note their name, how many bags of cubes/blocks each person ordered, how much they paid and how much change they are to receive (if change wasn’t made on the spot). Be very careful not to lose the money or the paperwork!!!
  • Once sufficient time has been given for everyone to place their orders, find the Bar Manager to see if there are any bags of cans to be delivered to “Recycle Camp” (located in or near center camp).
  • Take the art car, deliver the cans, and then get in line to buy ice.  Large Theme Camps get to use the back entrance to Arctica
  • After ice is purchased, load it onto the art car and go immediately back to camp
  • Immediately make an announcement that the ice orders have arrived and that people should come to the bar area to pick up their ice
  • Bar ice should be given to the “Bar Backs” so they can load it into the coolers.
  • As people come to collect their ice orders, take note on the paperwork and give change as needed
  • Walk through camp and announce the ice order arrival to any stragglers (or those who are apparently hard-of-hearing)
  • Return the supplies to SWB HQ when done

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 8am – 12pm

Equipment needed: Cleaning supplies, trash bags, gloves (all at the bar)

Objective: To ensure the village is free of M.O.O.P. (matter out of place – aka trash)

Duteis:

  • Wear rubber gloves during this job
  • Clean and organize the bar and bar trash/recycling cans at the bar
  • Walk through the village and pick up any and all trash… This includes areas around all camp toys, structures, shower area, across the esplanade, by the burn platform, etc.
  • If you find a village member’s camp/area to be particularly messy (with litter strewn about that could blow away in the wind), feel free to politely chastise them
  • Walk the streets on either side of the village and pick up trash
  • Full bags of aluminum cans are delivered to Recycle Camp during the ice run each day.  Bags full of other recyclables and general trash get distributed evenly amongst village members for disposal after the event.
  • Return cleaning products to their proper place under the bar when done…. then gotake a shower stinky

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 2pm – 2am

Equipment Needed: BDSM toys and cleaning supplies (located in the Bondage Tent), a sexy outfit, an open mind, sunglasses or a mask if you want to remain incognito

Objective: To provide entertainment and a fun/safe BDSM scene for participants and to put on a good show for the crowd. This is done to the extent of your comfort level and that of your slave/master/mistress.

Duties:

  • First and foremost, all “scenes” will be safe and consensual. Nobody will
    be forced or coerced into doing anything they don’t freely want to do.
  • Safe words will be used to control the scene. Participants will inform each other that the safe word “yellow” means that the scene is getting too intense and the Master/Mistress should “back down” a bit, but the scene doesn’t have to end yet. The safe word “red” means that the slave would like the scene to end now. Honor the safe words. If gags
    are used in the scene, use agreed upon “safe gestures”
  • There will be no public fluid exchange. The public bondage wall and other associated toys are not about sex, they are about entertainment. They are, however, about being sexy… and kinky… and perverted… but in a fun way. Actual sex is between you and whomever your consenting partner is and should be done in a private session (not open to the public)
  • All scenes will usually involve at least two people from Spanky’s. One (or more) to perform the “scene” and one (or more) to control the crowd. The “crowd control person” makes sure that nobody gets too close to accidentally get hit by a whip/paddle/etc AND to make sure that onlookers don’t interfere with the scene or take unauthorized photos/video.
  • Non SWB couples/groups ARE allowed to use the toys/equipment (ie. be both Dom and sub) but only under the supervision of a SWB M.O.D Squad member, to control the crowd and enforce the rules
  • If you are unsure of how to use any of the equipment safely and properly (whips, paddles, etc.) don’t use them until you have learned (Leaders of the MOD Squad are happy to give lessons). When finished with the toys, clean them and keep them stored in their proper place.
  • Upon meeting a new participant, ask them if they have ever done this before and get as much info as you can about what they want to happen during the session. Find out about the degree of nudity they are comfortable with
  • Make sure there is a complete understanding between the dom/sub regarding what their limits and/or comfort levels are. The more you/they know, the better the session will be for everyone
  • Keep the scene fun and entertaining!

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 2pm – 2am

Equipment Needed: Megaphone and a sexy outfit

Objective: To entice the citizens of BRC to partake in the toys and attractions of the village. To act as emcee and rile the crowd when appropriate. To make the village more fun!!! Entice passers-by on the streets to come into the bar

Duties:

  • When the bar, attractions, toys, etc are not crowded or being used, it is your job to go out on the street with a megaphone and entice people to come into our space. You can adopt whatever tone suits you… Carnival barker, game show host, snarky reporter, circus ring leader, info-mercial salesman, etc.
  • When the bar area is crowded, but the toys and other camps spaces are not being used, your job is to mingle through the crowd and greet our guests (no megaphone needed)
  • Make sure they read the rules of consent (Consent 101)
  • Carry some “dirty namebadges” with you (male and female).  These are a great ice-breaker.  Have a schtick… like, say, “pick a number between Neptune and Cucumber”… then choose a namebadge for them and proclaim, “You’re new name for the rest of the day is ________”.  Make sure they comprehend the name on the namebadge.
  • Let them know about all the attractions in the village
  • Give them a tour of the camps in the village if they want one
  • Introduce them to Masters/Mistresses/Slaves that are on duty or available, if they’re interested
  • Tell them about the bar games
  • Introduce them to other Spankers and other patrons at the bar
  • Let them know that they are welcome to dance on the bar or stage
  • Get customers to interact with each other… be a matchmaker!
  • Promote the upcoming camp events (see the events page or events schedule at the bar for details).  We usually have flyers at the bar which list our events for the week.
  • Recruit camp slaves! We all need slaves for massages, foot rubs, cooking, etc….and the bar area could always use more human benches! 😉
  • Let the customers know that they are in a safe space and it’s OK to get their freak on… within our limits.
  • Some people will be happy to just sit and chat at the bar with their friends, and that’s fine. Other people need a little social nudge to get them out of their shells… those are the people you are looking for
  • When the whole camp is totally rocking, get on the megaphone and cheerlead/commentate the wild things that are going on (bondage wall, spank-o-matic, etc
  • Be fun, be humorous, promote the village and/or camp names often.
  • Keep an eye on the streets around SWB to make sure that bicycles and art cars aren’t blocking traffic… this could be a serious problem if emergency vehicles can’t get through.

Shift duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 2pm – 2am

Equipment Needed: Flashlight, security vest, SWB radio, a talent for diplomacy

Objective: To check IDs at the door. To protect the village, it’s members and
customers. To guard private spaces.

Description: The Security Team’s main job is to ensure the security of the village during peak hours. To make sure that there are no under-age persons drinking alcohol or viewing “adult oriented” scenes in the village. Also, to ensure that the dancers and mistresses are not being harassed by anyone. And to guard private spaces when there are private scenes happening that are not open to the general public.

Security’s job is not one of violence or harsh confrontation, but rather, one of
diplomacy and reason. If any situation escalates to a threat of violence, the Diplomat should immediately attempt to contact a BRC Ranger or law enforcement. The only exception to this rule would be an immanent threat to somebody else’s safety, at which time the bouncer will shout “code blue” along with the location where help is needed. At that point, every member of the village within earshot will come to the bouncers/patrons aid in a attempt to stop any ensuing violence from occurring.

The Village Manager must be made aware of any situations as soon as possible.

Shift Duration: 2 hours

Hours of Operation: As determined by Sky (John M)

Equipment Needed: A sexy costume, a riding crop and the Spank-O-Matic, oh yeah, and a finger!

Objective: To safely administer spankings to our customers on the world famous Spank-O-Matic machine.

Duties:

  • Prior to administering spankings, make sure the customer is positioned properly (hands on knees and bent at the waist and knees) and that they are not wearing anything that could hurt/stab them when the paddle strikes
  • Inform customers that they must resist the temptation to put their hands behind them during the spanking as this could cause a broken finger
  • Nudity is allowed and encouraged, but not required
  • The customer should be informed to say “thank you” when they have had enough spankings
  • A riding crop is useful when positioning people to the right height and distance from the machine to receive a proper spank
  • Pay close attention to the customer when you depress the trigger to ensure that they are following the rules
  • Stop when they say “thank you” or if you notice a problem or malfunction.
  • If there are many people waiting for a spanking, try to keep them a bit organized.
  • Ask the crowd to keep a safe distance from the scene. Pictures are only allowed with the customer’s permission.

Safety:

  • Do not operate the machine unless you have been trained in it’s use by Sky or another qualified instructor
  • The Operator’s job is to spank the SOM participants by depressing the SOM activator button. Be sure to try it on yourself to understand how firm it is and how quickly it can re-cycle
  • It is important that you pay close attention to everything that is happening, particularly the reactions of the participant
  • DO NOT start spanking until everything is ready and safe
  • Stop spanking if the participant takes his/her hands off his/her knees, or if you see any problem with the machine or situation
  • Check the SOM often for loose parts
  • Do not allow anyone within 5 ft. of the SOM except for the participant.
  • NEVER give the controls to anyone else
  • If you need to put the controls down for any reason, turn off the machine first by disconnecting the air supply
  • If the machine becomes unsafe in any way, shut it down and fix it, or find someone who can

Shift Duration: 4 hours

Hours of Operation: 2pm-2am

Equipment Needed: Name badges, trash bag (kept inside the bar), and costume or cool outfit

Description: These are pre-made namebadges (ie. “Hello… My Name is:”) with humorous/dirty names on them. Sometimes they are clever double-entendres, sometimes they are obvious, sometimes you need to say them out loud a few times before you get the dirty meaning of the name.

You (and partner if you have one) go out on the street and stop people. You give them a new dirty name badge. You throw the trash in the trash bag.

This is a very social job. You will make lots of new friends. You will make lots of people laugh. You should also use this job to help promote village events, DJs, MPR, etc.

Have some kind of schtick too… like, say, “Pick a number between Neptune and cucumber”…then choose a namebadge for them and say, “Your name for the rest of the day is ______”.  Make sure they comprehend the name too.

 

 

Duties:

  • Distribute funny/dirty Hello Camp name badges to passers-by
  • Promote the village’s events and attractions

Hours of Operation: 2pm – 2am

Equipment Needed: Sexy Costume, or skimpy costume, or no costume!

Objective: To dance and be the unobtainable god/goddess that you are

Description: To entertain the crowds at the bar area by dancing on the bar top or the dancer stages. This job is meant for both males and females. Dress sexy… or undress sexy! (Or dress silly and dance silly). The DJ should be playing dance-able music for you. If he isn’t, politely ask him if he could. Please have a clear head while dancing so that you don’t fall. If you are being harassed by anyone, alert the bouncer, camp bitch, ambassador or the bartenders. ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO JOIN YOU!


Drink water between shifts

Shift Duration: 4 hrs

Hours of Operation: 2pm – 2am

Equipment and Skills Needed:  Racetrack & Frame, Betting Stand, Color-Coded Vibrators, Loud Voice (or Megaphone), Betting Tokens, Dry-Erase Markers, Prizes, Colored Electrical Tape, Batteries, Wooden Board

Objective: To encourage people to play the game, run the game, and give away prizes

Description: Do a couple of test-runs before your shift begins. If the angle of the track needs to be adjusted, the frame allows for raising/lowering the top of the track to increase/decrease the speed of the vibrators, during the race.

Shift Duration: 8 hrs (of being on-call… counts as 4 hrs of workshift time)

Hours of Operation: 10am – 2am

Equipment Needed: Medical Training (preferably Doctor, Nurse, ALS, EMT) SWB Radio, SWB medical kit & defibrillator, knowledge of where things are located in SWB Sanctuary (Usually a tent adjacent to the camp kitchn), knowledge of who has art-cars in SWB and their locations.

Objective: To be “on call” for Healthcare, Melt-Down, and First Aid related problems… and deal with these situations

Description: Spanky’s “Sancturary” is a place where somebody who is having a playa-meltdown can retreat and recover. Food, water, shade, and comfort are available… as well as some wonderful Spankers. Sanctuary is also a place where Spankers can find somebody with medical training, or psychiatric experience, or just a shoulder to cry on.  And we can perform some minor first aid when needed.

You will work in conjunction with Jovy, who is the leader of Sanctuary and Eve (camp momma). They can help provide sustenance and comfort for those in need.

While SWB doesn’t provide advanced medical care, we can provide first aid and comfort. As the Sanctuary Team volunteer, you can provide this… but more importantly, you make “judgement calls” regarding whether or not the person in crisis needs to be taken to EMS for immediate advanced medical support.